Rivers of Living Water...

(Bear with me, I am angry)

I have this friend that I have had for the last 12 years. Since I moved here from Texas. She was the first women that I embraced when I got here. (I have said before that I have had issues with women--still do, I tend to irritate them somehow--that’s another post). I love her. She has been my sister and vice versa. We have been through great things together, encouraging one another--I was there when her crazy ex tried to jump off the building. (I think she forgot that--probably not) She was there when mine cheated on me and got some girl pregnant (he thought--Whole other post!!!) Remind me to tell that one day.

Anyway…I am the middle of a great transition in my life. I am working on my books and editing this overdue project--fighting for some peace, etc, etc, etc. One specific day G-d had me to call her and check in. I did, though I was hesitant and very busy because whenever he does this, I know I am about to have to tell someone something and I hate that! I chatted with her and we talked about the children, work, blah, blah, blah. Without her mentioning it, I knew that she was in a new relationship. Finally, she got around to it. When she began to talk, in the middle of all of that the Holy Spirit began to talk to me to tell her some stuff. Being that I was quiet, she knew that.

Now, I asked her no questions but then she asked me what I had to tell her. I begin to tell her where I was and what G-d had me to say. It was a confirmation to her spirit yet, it was not what she wanted to hear and therefore she copped an attitude. I mean UGLY attitude(see why I have issues with women?). Sometimes too much D.R.A.M.A.! I really don’t have time for it. I hated it in the world and avoided it like the plague. I am no different in that respect now. More tolerant, because he often has me minister to DRAMA QUEENS--who claim they are not. If you don‘t like drama--why does it always follow you?(I think that’s why I irritate them).

First of all, I thought we were closer than that and second of all why you mad at me? Get mad with G-d! Shoot, I was simply the messenger and not the first one at that.

Here is the problem:
She is dating someone that is still married--in the process of getting divorced. Not always a bad thing. But first of all I don’t care what you do. You are grown and you are free. I’m not here to tell you what to do. Not my job. What I said was because G-d said to tell you. Next, if I know you hard-headed, I won’t say jack unless he tells me too or unless you ask. I feel like, why should I waste my time? You ain’t listening!
Okay, biblically, Abigail met David and they were both married. That’s true. Often times we are in some mess that he didn’t ordain in the first place and in his eyes we are just in a legal/man thing and not his thing so we are just as single as the next person. After any relationship we all need to be processed. If you want to use Abigail and David--fine but know that in the customs of the Jewish people, the widow had a period of mourning. Her marriage was not instant to David. Nevertheless, You can skip them. Let’s see, Esther--was prepared for a king for over a year. If you look at in from a natural sense she was being prepared in scents/perfumes--spiritually she was being purified I.e. processed. That’s an example of what he desires for us. This man is getting divorced and already he's ready for you? We all need time to heal and grow in between relationships. But, whatever.

Umm…next, when G-d sends you a man, he is not going to contradict himself to give him to you! He is not expecting you to shack or give up the booty. What is it with women? Can we not keep ourselves together until we get married. Dang! I am so frustrated with women.

And this is my pet peeve….if you screwing, leave G-d out of it because we KNOW that ain’t him! Stop attaching him to some mess! As Christian women there aught to be a difference between us and the women in the world! We should have a standard. Shoot! Show me where he said get some prior to marriage. You can not tell me that you have met some man and you and he are screwing and G-d has confirmed the you and he belong together. The fact that you are screwing is an indication of immaturity and with him it’s all about maturity. You can’t control your flesh now, nor can the man and usually later on that will be an issue again. He never tells us to do something he has never told anyone else to do. Show me where that’s at in the bible. Now if you ask the for a confirmation, SATAN can give you one too. G-d’s confirmations line up with the word. But now for you, he has started contradicting himself? I don’t think so.

If you want to skip all the bible stories--she had ME for an example. I am living testimony of what happens when you ignore G-d. She has known me all this time. She has watched me be evicted, financially barren, sick--bout to die, working two jobs at some points, stuck now until I get that I can not make a decision without his sanction! Do you not remember all the crying I have done to you over the phone? And all the frustrations and anxieties? Do you remember that my children have had to suffer as a result of my IGNORANT decision? My children have had to go with me in my mess. And on top of that I have had the nerve to have more children after all of this! Has my life not taught you anything? You want your kids to go through all of this too?

There aught to be a law called “my friends testimony” that would teach the rest of us what not to do. The problem with sex prior to marriage is that it clouds our judgment and discernment. Flesh is involved and we can no longer think like we would if our focus was clear. Actually I won’t say that, after the flesh is involved we simply decide to ignore the right way because “things” feel good. Call me when you realize that dang I screwed up and sex is the last thing on your mind and you are still expected to be a wife! Now that’s a test! Call me when you are grieving for what you have put your kids through.

DANG! I am aching for my friend because if G-d tells us to warn you, there is only one end to the story. The one he’s trying to keep you from and the one you think won’t happen because ya’ll all happy now. Ask any woman that has suffered a damaging relationship. We are always happy, in the beginning. But you think the rest of us are all jaded now. Bitter. Trying to “rain on your parade”. No, we are simply wiser. Often worn and weary from the journey that has left us aching. We are the casualties of a war you don’t have to fight because you are being warned. Just like I was.

If your friend warns you, it’s not a judgment on your character or you. It’s out of love for who you are. Take it as that. I hope one day my friend and I are okay. I pray for her because if she fails to heed G-d, she will be tested in her strength and her faith. She will see what she has seen in my life in her own. She’ll know what it is to make a decision that can mess up your life--and your children’s.

Be Blessed. Chosen.

Friday...Dating tips/Every illness has a spiritual cause/the law of attraction.

Posted by Chosen on Thursday, June 29, 2006 at 12:44 AM | Permalink